Sheep for brains

This just in from New York dork geniuses Patrick Mortensen and Andrew Roth. To be sung to the tune of Tom Waits's Singapore, and seriously, you're missing half the RPG fun if you haven't given the original song a listen.

ANDREW:
When settling on the Isle Catan
'Tis best to gambit near varied lands
Trade blood red brick for lambs o' four
The whole settlement's made of iron ore

PATRICK:
I'm shooting for the Longest Road.
My bin for wheat has overflowed.
In the Land of Catan the Robber is the Veep...
Please buy my sheep...

We sail tonight for East Catan.
More brick is what I need to get,
But no one's rolled' eleven' yet.
I'm scared of the expansion set.
I won't block your access to the docks
If you dress like that chick on the box.
That settler is a stone-cold fox.
German Colonialism rocks.
Pass a development card to me

ANDREW:
We sail tonight for land Catan
Forget her sheep! I’ve bricks in hand
I’d not cross me now even if you could
You've no road nearby and you’ll be wanting wood
I’ll build a town with my next card
‘Fore you cut me off with that boulevard
Or trade these three -- my hope deferred --
That I’ll draw a soldier third
And the largest army comes to me

PATRICK:
We sail tonight down to Catan.
Where "Sheep" is a retirement plan.
I soon shall test your mettle, gents:
Behold! Here's my fourthS ettlement.
Boo-yeah, I've drawn the "Year of Plenty";
I'm a Hexacartographic Cognoscente.
Klaus Teuber cribbed Starship's refrain:
"We built this city on Ore and Grain"
And the hoopla comes knee-deep to me.